somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
