I cannot find my penis.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize