Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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