i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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