She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
