I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
i think i just lost a toe
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
