so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
