am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
