I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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