yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize