I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
