would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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