My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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