I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
