Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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