theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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