How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
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