Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Randomize
