At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize