Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
