Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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