He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
