Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
