Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
