You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
