gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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