I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
