i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
