it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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