Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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