new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
the day after is always just damage control
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize