i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Randomize
