I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Send help, water and tortillas.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
You are the jesus of drinking
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
