Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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