And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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