did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
you're hired as official boob wrangler
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
