Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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