ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize