I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Houston, we have a squirter
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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