No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
