Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
