ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
