In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
