just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
