Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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