just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
