i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
You're a waste of cheezeits
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
