I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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