tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
