Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
