Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
