I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
