Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
